Basic editing really matters. There is no excuse for the number of grammar and spelling errors I find on men's profiles. Before you post your profile, send it through a word-processing program's spell- and grammar-check. Then, read it over ten times. Then, have someone else check it for errors, and if that person happens to be a trustworthy woman, have her edit it for content...but that's another conversation. I encounter some really common errors that to a person like me, pretty anal about language, look just terrible. I don't care or expect that every guy I date is the kind of person who never makes a mistake. Still, if you're a guy who can't write well, you ought to know it and it should prompt you to try harder to edit before you post.
The word "someone" is ONE word, not "some one," idiots. Don't be idiots.
Remember the difference between THERE, THEIR and THEY'RE and also remember that a sentence about an individual will include singular pronouns like SHE and HER. Come on, fellas...pretend you remember third grade. "I want a woman who takes care of herself," NOT "I want a woman that takes care of their self" (also, not "themselves," which is at least actually a word, as wrong as it still would be in this context, and definitely not "there self" Duh!). As a side note regarding this sentiment, it's lame and on a future post, I'll address these covert suggestions that a woman must be good-looking.
There is absolutely no call for text-speak on your official online profile. Don't abbreviate things when you have access to an entire keyboard and no penalty for use of space. If your profile has gotten so long that you need to literally shorten words and phrases to fit it all in your allotted space, it's WAY too long. Edit content in that case. If you're attempting to use an abbreviation to be cute or casual, make sure you spell it right. I'm talking to you, Mr. "New2SacNeedsLoven"; it's "LOVIN', " you fool.
Remember or at least look up the difference between TO, TOO and TWO. Jesus, guys...this is so basic.
Remember or at least look up the difference between YOUR and YOU'RE.
Alright. Lesson's over. While your profile may still suck due to all kinds of content issues, at least you won't be turning women off by neglect of p's and q's. Good luck.
Monday, June 30, 2008
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
Introducing ME! Sacramento's Dating Advice Queen!
Hello, brave fellows willing to admit your complete cluelessness! This is a great step in the right direction, that is, away from being the kind of dudes that women laugh or cry about to their girlfriends. I have decided to write this blog in order to help all those men who do all those wrong things that seem so unnecessarily damning. It occurred to me a while back that I've met so many guys who wouldn't have been bad people but who came off so poorly either on a date or, more often, on their online dating profiles, as to make me run screaming (or laughing)! Are YOU a good guy who can't understand why you keep getting rejected? Read on, Hero.
The first step is to establish a profile, a persona, that doesn't send every single wrong message about you. Seriously, not sending the wrong message is more important than getting across the most accurate, deepest truths about your very being. Online dating requires this exercise but it's valuable to think about this "profile" of yourself even if you don't go the online route. For those of you doing the match.com, e-harmony, chemistry.com, etc. thing, this section applies specifically to you but I think the advice will still be of some use to face-to-facers.
Sit down and start writing about yourself to yourself, in your own handwriting. It's important that draft 1 of this self-search NEVER sees the light of day! So often, it's painfully obvious that a guy spent approximately 45 seconds composing this oh-so-important introduction before braodcasting it to the universe. It shows, guys. It really does. Ever since I started thinking about creating this resource for you, I've continually compiled a list of mistakes men have made in their online profiles.
ONLINE DATING DON'T FOR THE DAY, June 26, 2008
Pictures of you with your shirt off. Don't argue. None. At all. No, not even if it's waterskiing...no, not even if it's from a long the distance...no, no, no. It's tacky. Now, fellas, you may just be as good looking as you think you are. Make no mistake, though; almost no man on earth is as hot as he thinks he is. Women are different. They're self-deprecating, negative, critical of their own appearances to a fault. Few women would ever consider putting semi-nude pics of themselves on the internet. Regarding your semi-nude pics, guys, it's highly unlikely that you look anywhere as good as you think you do but more importantly, even if you're fine as hell, you look like a douchebag to show off in this cocky, misguided manner. It's one of several areas where men make the gross error of assuming similarities between the sexes where none exist. Men might be turned on by a pic of a potential date in her bikini. Idiot men might find such a thing a real plus, a positive omen for the viability of a future relationship with this sexy lady. Women can certainly appreciate a nice set of pecs and biceps but they are never going to seriously date a guy based on body parts alone and they're actually put off by the shameless display. I admit I have gone out with a few guys who committed this sin and included the shirtless pics. I can forgive, pretend they know no better, whatever. It's never worked out even a little. Cockiness is a sad, tell-tale sign of insecurity. Men who are truly secure, who believe that they offer a positive complete package to a deserving woman, don't need to pitch cheap skin-shots.
The first step is to establish a profile, a persona, that doesn't send every single wrong message about you. Seriously, not sending the wrong message is more important than getting across the most accurate, deepest truths about your very being. Online dating requires this exercise but it's valuable to think about this "profile" of yourself even if you don't go the online route. For those of you doing the match.com, e-harmony, chemistry.com, etc. thing, this section applies specifically to you but I think the advice will still be of some use to face-to-facers.
Sit down and start writing about yourself to yourself, in your own handwriting. It's important that draft 1 of this self-search NEVER sees the light of day! So often, it's painfully obvious that a guy spent approximately 45 seconds composing this oh-so-important introduction before braodcasting it to the universe. It shows, guys. It really does. Ever since I started thinking about creating this resource for you, I've continually compiled a list of mistakes men have made in their online profiles.
ONLINE DATING DON'T FOR THE DAY, June 26, 2008
Pictures of you with your shirt off. Don't argue. None. At all. No, not even if it's waterskiing...no, not even if it's from a long the distance...no, no, no. It's tacky. Now, fellas, you may just be as good looking as you think you are. Make no mistake, though; almost no man on earth is as hot as he thinks he is. Women are different. They're self-deprecating, negative, critical of their own appearances to a fault. Few women would ever consider putting semi-nude pics of themselves on the internet. Regarding your semi-nude pics, guys, it's highly unlikely that you look anywhere as good as you think you do but more importantly, even if you're fine as hell, you look like a douchebag to show off in this cocky, misguided manner. It's one of several areas where men make the gross error of assuming similarities between the sexes where none exist. Men might be turned on by a pic of a potential date in her bikini. Idiot men might find such a thing a real plus, a positive omen for the viability of a future relationship with this sexy lady. Women can certainly appreciate a nice set of pecs and biceps but they are never going to seriously date a guy based on body parts alone and they're actually put off by the shameless display. I admit I have gone out with a few guys who committed this sin and included the shirtless pics. I can forgive, pretend they know no better, whatever. It's never worked out even a little. Cockiness is a sad, tell-tale sign of insecurity. Men who are truly secure, who believe that they offer a positive complete package to a deserving woman, don't need to pitch cheap skin-shots.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
